Here we go.

I guess I have to get past it, that awkward first moment. We're like those people in a romantic comedy who reach for the same thing and our hands lightly touch. You feel slightly violated and you apologize and wish silently you'd never agreed to go out with me in the first place.

But now it's too late, this meaningful, albeit cliche moment has bonded us forever (or at least for the rest of the time you sit here reading this. Time that you will never get back, mind you).
Because this is the start of something potentially great...


...Or a complete failure, but we're going to stay optimistic for now since this is only the first post (or quite possibly the only post if I forget I even started this. It's happened before).


Before we get any further into this I'm gonna clear some things up.

One, I'm not pregnant (if that happens I'll be just as surprised as you), therefore this blog is not about being pregnant or eating for the health of both you and your child. I don't want to put you through another condescending "better than you" raising your children blog.

Two, this blog is not about obesity or some inspirational yet emotionally unstable battle against my weight. I (hope I) am at my healthy weight, so if that's what you were hoping for, you're outta luck. I just named the blog that because I say it now and then and I'm personally proud of its hilariousness.

To be honest, I can't really tell you what this blog is going to be about. I'll just tell you it's going to be a surprise, not only for you but for both of us... because I have no idea either.

If you feel like this isn't going anywhere, that's probably because it isn't. Maybe our hour and a half of love is over and the credits have started rolling (symbolism is cool. Tell yourself that until you believe it), so until next time, just lie to your friends about how much you liked this so you can seem as cool as possible.


Thanks for being awesome,




Riley


(I was talking to myself just then)